Are you doing things to succeed or doing things to ensure you do not lose?
There are subtle but very important differences.
In 2018, I attended an entrepreneur conference in the US and there was this panel speaker who shared a personal story with us.
“I asked God, ‘just tell me directly, should I or should I not?!'”
According to her, God said, “you are asking a different question. The question you are really asking is, “If I do this, am I going to fail?”
According to her, this was a huge eye-opener and mindset shift because she suddenly realized that she had been tiptoeing around an idea she had with the attitude of executing her plan in a way that will not result in failure rather than in a way that will yield success.
That point of hesitation before taking a decision is the borderline you must recognize.
My lesson? Doing to succeed rather than doing not to fail makes all the difference because when you approach a venture from the mindset of not wanting to lose, the following happens:
- You are not committed to the venture and whenever there is no commitment, success is almost impossible.
- Not wanting to lose means your best self is not engaged thus leading to mediocre results.
- You are playing a defensive game and when you do that, you will barely survive because you are passive.
- Playing not to lose is a response to fear and when we give in to fear, we get demobilized
- You worry about what might go wrong rather than the opportunities that the inherent challenges will bring. In other words, you will miss the opportunities that are meant to be steppingstones for you!
- You will eventually lose, and it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy!
That point of hesitation before taking a decision is the borderline you must recognize. Failure to do that may just be the death knell for success.
So, when next you are hesitating about a situation, ask yourself; am I in this to win or am I in this to not lose?
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Written by Dapo Bankole.
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